You probably don't listen to Fred Thompson's radio show every week — especially now that you're busy reading Going Rogue — so for those who missed it, here's the former D.A. Senator's opinion of the war effort in Afghanistan…

"It really doesn't matter how President Obama divides the Afghan baby, how he splits the difference between McChrystal and Biden. Because the war has been lost," Thompson said on his radio show today.

(Barack Obama has a secret Afghan baby??!!?!??)

Ahem. Now, if Fred Thompson had heard Fred Thompson saying that the war has been lost, Fred Thompson would have been outrageously outraged to an outrageous degree. Because here's what Fred Thompson told Sean Hannity in 2007 when Harry Reid suggested that the war in Iraq had been lost…

I [Fred Thompson] asked [a former Army captain] what she thought about this. She said, "How in the world can anyone, any one of our leaders, declare war, declare that the war has been lost when we've got troops in the field? My friends are over there in the field. I know what they think about this."

And, of course, it's just like all other Americans think. The very idea that they would do this and undercut our efforts over there is unprecedented. And it's not only unprecedented; it's awful politics.

But this is different, you see, in so many ways.

When Fred Thompson tells us that the war in Afghanistan has been lost, he's making a legitimate if controversial criticism of specific decisions being made (or not made) by the Obama administration.

Whereas when Harry Reid did that, he was being a Democrat.

Fred Thompson has joined the legions of small-c conservatives backing big-C Conservative Party candidate Doug Hoffman for Congress in New York's 23rd district, because as a professional actor he just couldn't turn down this commercial script.

Couple tiny editorial suggestions, though: the ad writers forgot 'ACORN' and 'the gays' in that list of reasons why America is in so much trouble (unless those things are implied by the word 'trouble' itself?).

Also, if Doug Hoffman is "not a career politician" who will leave Washington as soon as "the job is done," does that mean he'll go on to a) write books about how much trouble America is still in despite his success in "finishing the job," b) go on a speaking tour to explain same, or c) get caught having an affair with an exotic dancer?

I guess we'll just have to wait and see, assuming we survive the next few years.

The Republicans are having a tough go of late. The other day I referred to them as "the party of Lincoln," and all my pennies cringed. But there may be a light at the end of the tunnel if the party of Hoover, Nixon and Bush follows the advice of Stephen Colbert.

The Colbert Report airs Monday through Thursday at 11:30pm / 10:30c.

We asked you to vote on the Best Political Faux Pas of 2008, and you have decided.

But first, here's the nominees…

* John Edwards

* Sarah Palin

* Joe Biden

* Eliot Spitzer

* Fred Thompson

* Barack Obama

* Elizabeth Dole

And the winner is…

Read more »

Last week, we asked you to nominate the great politicians of 2008 for the honored Best Political Faux Pas of 2008 award. And you came out in great numbers to do so.

Here are your nominees…

* John Edwards for getting busted porking some floosy by the National Enquirer. (Cube)

* Sarah Palin for thinking Africa was a country and deducing the proximity of Russia to Alaska equates to foreign policy experience. Really that's two fuck-ups. Actually, all of her interviews. (Cube)

* Joe Biden for guaranteeing a manufactured crisis testing Obama's mettle within his first six months in office. (Cube)

* Eliot Spitzer for nailing a hot call girl and not defending himself. (Cube)

* Fred Thompson for coughing and sleeping instead of campaigning. (Cube)

* Barack Obama for his choice for the faux Parthenon at the Democratic National Convention. (Cube)

* Elizabeth Dole for stating that her opponent didn't believe in God when she was in fact a Sunday School teacher. (Bob, I mean Cube)

(Jeeze, I wonder which nominator is gonna win this one.)

He'd been threatening to make a run for the chairmanship of the Republican National Committee, but this week Fred Thompson decided to forsake the muddy trenches of politics for Acting.

Because do you know how much the chair of the RNC earns? Not half as much as that Lauren Conrad* gal…

"He called me yesterday and said [the chairmanship] is not in the cards," said Nashville businessman B.C. "Scooter" Clippard, a close Thompson associate who headed fundraising for Thompson's presidential campaign. Clippard said Thompson chose to remain in the private sector, working to resume his television acting career.

"He said he had spent the last two years of his life trying to be president and helping John McCain be president and during that time, he didn't have much income. He has a family" and needs to earn an income, Clippard said.

Gee, I had no idea Fred Thompson was so hard up for cash.

If only he'd played a major role on a popular hour-long drama that airs in reruns every hour of every day, in every corner of the developed world. He could've earned mad residuals on something like that.

* Don't even pretend like she's not acting.