Okay, bear with me for a minute.

The University of Wolverhampton — which, as far as I can tell, is a real place — recently announced that the oldest known joke in world is 4,000 year old and from Sumeria. It goes a little like this…

Something which has never occurred since time immemorial; a young woman did not fart in her husband's lap.

Classic. (I'm pretty sure John Kerry tried to pull that one off in 2004, screwed it up and then ended up losing the coveted flatuphilia demographic.)

Anyway, the CC Insider claims to have unearthed some jokes that are even oldester. Among them…

A Pithycanthropus Erectus, a Cro-Magnon and a Neanderthal walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What do you guys think of John McCain?"

What can I say? I'm a sucker for Pithycanthropus Erectus humor.

If you were reading last week, you'll remember that we introduced you to four efforts by public figures to jump on the bandwagon started by Barack Obama's iconic "Hope" poster (originally created by Shepard Fairey):

We also put out a call for submissions for more posters along these lines. So between our intrepid commenters and a few Indecision staffers who felt left out, we offer you Part 2:

(Thanks to commenters nullpup and iowagradstudent.) Which led to…

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We kind of mentioned this last week, but there's been an update.

What is coming to the world when even the oldest of made-up belief systems aren't sacred anymore?

A written prayer that Barack Obama left this week in the cracks of the Western Wall, Judaism's holiest site, asks God to guide him and guard his family, an Israeli newspaper reported Friday.

It seems that somebody stole the note right out of the wall and then tripped over himself trying to get it to the first newspaper that would publish it. Ordinarily I would have a problem with this, but, given the nature of the note, I think it's justified…

I like the sentiment. No wonder he's up nine points.

By now, pretty much everybody has seen the poster to the right, which Shepard Fairey (originator of "OBEY" and other meme-tastic viral stickers) created in support of Barack Obama's campaign. And while Fairey isn't affiliated with the campaign in any official way, they certainly owe him some Andre-the-Giant-sized kudos for epitomizing their candidate's brand in such a memorable example of wood-cutty Americana goodness. Just looking at that picture, we can't tell whether we want to vote for him, send him money, or offer a burnt ox upon an altar while singing the glory of his name. It's just that good.

But we believe in equal coverage under the blog, so we thought we'd share a few posters in the same vein, but customized to capture the spirit of other public figures:

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From The CC Insider…

Beloved American comic Bernie Mac, who is often referred to as the black Bill Cosby, found himself facing a hostile crowd when he made what the press is calling an "off-color" joke at a fundraiser for Barack Obama last Friday…

"My little nephew came to me and he said, 'Uncle, what's the difference between a hypothetical question and a realistic question?'" Mac said. "I said, I don't know, but I said, 'Go upstairs and ask your mother if she'd make love to the mailman for $50,000.'" As the joke continued, the punchline evoked an angry response from at least one person in the audience, who said it was offensive to women.

For shame! Anyone who can make a joke about prostituting one's wife to the mailman for fifty grand has obviously never had to face that terrible choice. (And as my wife will tell you, after taxes, $50,000 is really not a whole lot.)

But rather than just jumping on the outrage-pile, we'd like to offer some constructive criticism in the form of the following jokes, which have been focus-group tested, run by Legal, thoroughly pre-vetted by various committees, and are guaranteed to be 100% safe for your next Democratic fundraising gig…

* "Why did the laid-off factory worker cross the road? To get access to decent heath care, which he'd never get under George W. Bush, so he tried to go to Canada, but he got stopped by the border patrol and shipped off to Guantanamo Bay, where he was waterboarded into giving false confessions. That's not my America."

* "A Democrat, a Republican, and an Independent walk into a bar, and the bartender says to the Democrat, 'You clearly have the best vision for our nation. Here, take my guns!'"

* "My little nephew came to me and said, 'Uncle, what's the difference between a hypothetical question and a realistic question?' I said, 'I don't know, but go upstairs and ask your mother if she'd like equal pay for equal work. And tell her I'm so sorry for the crimes committed by my gender; if she needs me, I'll be in the shed whipping myself."

* "A Democrat and a Republican show up at the pearly gates. The Republican goes to hell because it turns out God is a lesbian of color."

* "Take my progressive taxation and domestic infrastructure reinvestment plan, please!"