80. The Doom Bunker

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Uh oh. Looks like Chairman Obama has been siccing his Ministry of Information agents on Wikipedia to scrub his page clean of all the important, completely-not-conspiratory information about him…

The brewing scandal was first reported by WorldNetDaily reporter Aaron Klein, who noticed that edits adding references to [William] Ayers and [Jeremiah] Wright, among other things, were quickly being undone by Wikipedia volunteers.

Klein found it particularly alarming that a Wikipedia user called "Jerusalem21" was recently hit with a three-day wiki-suspension after twice posting the neutral and encyclopedic fact that there are "some doubts about whether Obama was born in the U.S. "

That was Sunday. Fox picked up Klein's explosive scoop today, noting in the first paragraph that — in contrast to Obama's entry — the Wikipedia "pages for Ayers and Wright are heavily peppered with references to the president."

What?! You mean the Wiki pages for Bill Ayers and Jeremiah Wright — two men who are talked about today solely because of their relationships with Barack Obama — mention their relationships with Barack Obama. But the page about Barack Obama doesn't mention them?

What can they possibly write about on his page if not about Jeremiah Wright or William Ayers? Has he done anything else of importance besides know them?

Well, I mean, besides the presidency thing.

Presidential elections in our country tend to put greater emphasis on church attendance than, say, international nuclear proliferation. And this year was no exception, with pastors like Jeremiah Wright and John Hagee getting far more press exposure than actual presidential candidates like Tom Vilsack and Jim Gilmore.

No one knew this better than Barack Obama, whose campaign nearly collapsed under the weight of Wright's controversial sermons and God-awful JFK impersonation. The Illinois Senator felt forced to drop out of Wright's church and bounce between a number of other ones between late April and Election Day.

But now that he won, he can finally drop that whole act…

President-elect Barack Obama has yet to attend church services since winning the White House earlier this month, a departure from the example of his two immediate predecessors.

On the three Sundays since his election, Obama has instead used his free time to get in workouts at a Chicago gym.

Indeed, there are few place you're more likely to find Obama than not in church. Recall, if you will, the controversy surrounding Wright's "God damn America" sermon. Obama claims to have never heard Wright utter those words. Why?

Because he didn't attend church that day.

And where was Obama when Hagee declared that Hitler was sent by God to herd the Jews to Israel? Hypocritically playing basketball perhaps.

Come to think of it, Obama has also been neglecting his obligations to secretly attend a mosque and secretly pray toward Mecca five times per day ever since the day he was born!

What a disappointment.  Doesn't Obama realize that religious zealots make by far the most entertaining presidents?  The man hasn't even taken office, and already he's making Dick Cheney look like Jimmy Swaggart at a pentacostal tent revival.

Matt Yglesias has the early word on Obama's top-five cabinet picks:

1. Chief of Staff: Jeremiah Wright
2. Secretary of State: Rashid Khalidi
3. Secretary of Defense: Bill Ayers
4. Attorney-General: Bernardine Dohrn
5. Secretary of the Treasury: Tony Rezko

And while they may think that running the United States of America is one big Commufasciterrorist party now, they'll soon discover that the palling around ends when the real business of governing the American pig-dog parastate to its hateful, long-deserved end begins.

If you did, then you missed the memo from McCain campaign manager Rick Davis. He tells right-wing radio host Hugh Hewitt that his campaign still might conjure up a Wright Redux before Election Day…

John McCain's campaign manager says he is reconsidering using Barack Obama's relationship with Reverend Jeremiah Wright as a campaign issue during the election's closing weeks…

The Arizona Republican, Davis argued, had been jilted by the remarks of Rep. John Lewis, who compared recent GOP crowds to segregationist George Wallace's rallies. And, as such, the campaign was going to "rethink" what was in and out of political bounds.

Indeed, it has been a long time since we've seen or heard from Reverend Wright, who, since his National Press Club fiasco, seems to be taking advice from Dick Cheney's travel agent.

But now it seems he's coming to a McCain ad near you. The only question is, in what form?

Will he be draped in robes and shouting "God Damn America "? Will he be bickering with Sean Hannity about black liberation theology? Or will he be performing a gay marriage between Bill Ayers and Joe the Plumber?

Only Rick Davis knows for sure.

20 years ago, a young black atheist lawyer decided to join the Trinity United Church of Christ at a time that just so happened to coincide with his first forays into political life.

And that ended up working out so well for him.