John Edwards
October 5 at 4:45PM
So Indecision asked me to write a list of women who have had infamous sexual relationships with political figures.
“Oh, like political mistresses?" I asked.
“No. More like Secret Girlfriends,” they replied.
“Secret Girlfriends? What? Why would you call them that?”
“Oh, no reason.”
#7 – William Rufus King
Senator from Alabama, Vice President under Franklin Pierce, and according to some, President James Buchanan’s lover. “Where’s my proof,” you ask? To which I reply, “Proof? Really? This is the internet.” In any event, Buchanan was our nation’s only bachelor President and he did live with King for quite some time. Need more? Well, apparently Andrew Jackson used to refer to King as “Miss Nancy.” So there’s that. Although I must confess that even in the 1800’s “Miss Nancy” seems like a pretty weak slam on a guy you’re trying to paint as gay. Is that really the best Old Hickory could do? More like “Old Dickory,” amirite? See what I mean?
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September 21 at 3:07PM
 Tabloidy gutter-rag the New York Times ran, over the weekend, another juicy story about John Edwards, that guy who used to do PR for mills. Nobody likes John Edwards much any more, ever since he cheated on his dying wife and fathered an illegitimate child with Rielle Hunter and lied about it, which is why there are investigations and calls for paternity tests and all kinds of embarrassing things going on right now.
But according to the Times, which has a copy of a book proposal written by former Edwards aide Andrew Young, the most humiliating detail of all is this: John Edwards is secretly that "sensitive" guy you dated in college…
Mr. Edwards once calmed an anxious Ms. Hunter by promising her that after his wife died, he would marry her in a rooftop ceremony in New York with an appearance by the Dave Matthews Band.
Oh, Rielle. Honey. You can't buy a line like that. Face it, that guy is just going to get wasted on Natty Light and vomit on your couch.
Anyway, now that the jig is up and the feds are involved, music fans around the world will never get a chance to hear the super-special song Daaaaave was going to compose for the Edwards-Hunter nuptials: "I Cheated on My Dying Wife and Fathered an Illegitimate Child With You Oooh Crash Into Me (Harmonica Solo)." Such a loss.
August 19 at 6:04PM
* The Onion: Congress Deadlocked on How Not to Provide Health Care.
* Please don't let the idiot train leave for health care protest town without Michele Bachmann! She's a'comin'!
* Sen. Max Baucus is under attack from the YouTubes.
* Barack Obama's mother-in-law practices Santeria, but she ain't got no crystal ball.
* John Edwards is moving his little bundle of political irrelevancy closer to home.
June 29 at 12:24PM
 There's been so much sexy sexing of sexy ladies by the sexy, sexy men of the Republican Party lately, I'd almost forgotten about the Democrat who put the 'sexy' in 'tawdry cheating' last year. And with better hair!
Thanks for the reminder, Daily News, plus visuals…
Former John Edwards aide Andrew Young says the ex-senator and his former mistress, Rielle Hunter, once made a sex tape, according to someone who has seen Young’s book proposal.
While he was unpacking, Young discovered a videocassette, according to the book pitch. Hunter had been hired by the Edwards campaign to videotape the candidate’s movements, but this one is said to have shown him taking positions that weren’t on his official platform.
Well, that's kind of a letdown.
Nothing's hotter than two consenting adults trying to achieve universal health care by creating regional "Health Care Markets" to let every American share the bargaining power to purchase an affordable, high-quality health plan, increase choices among insurance plans and cut costs for businesses offering insurance. Rrrrowwwrrrr.
May 13 at 1:41PM
 I don't know about you, but on a beautiful day like today, I really enjoy lying in the grass, staring up into the clouds and wondering What if…
But, since I've got a job, I usually just end up reading bullshit unfounded speculation on the Internet instead…
[If John Edwards had not run for president] Could Hillary Clinton have grabbed Edwards' loyalists and won early, stage-setting contests in Iowa, where Barack Obama emerged as a contender with a stunning win, or later, in the South Carolina primary?
Yes, says Mark Penn, Clinton's close campaign adviser and pollster. Penn has asserted that without Edwards on the ballot, voters would have taken a "fresh look" at Clinton.
Well, if Mark Penn says it, it must be true. Why, he's never proven himself to be wrong-headed, duplicitous or willfully ignorant before. That guy is a straight shooter if ever I did see one.
But, just for the sake of adding length to this post, let's see what somebody who knows what he's talking about has to say. What does Mark Blumenthal from Pollster.com have to say about it?
Mark Blumenthal from Pollster.com: "The most compelling evidence concerns where Edwards' support might have gone, had he withdrawn once the campaign had gotten under way in early 2007: polls showing that Edwards supporters preferred Obama to Clinton as their second choice in Iowa (as early as May 2007) and in New Hampshire (a few days before the primary)…
"Edwards started the race as the leading candidate in Iowa. Had Edwards withdrawn in late 2006, others who were considering the race at about that time — Tom Vilsack, Evan Bayh, Mark Warner — might have gotten in."
Yeah. Edwards' campaign was the only thing standing between Evan Bayh and the White House.
He must be very bitter.
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