Since I have a feeling a good majority of you don't follow my friend Ian on Facebook, I feel pretty safe just flat out stealing the following introductory text for this story from him, and none of you will be any the wiser. The perfect crime!

Anyway…

Hey, it just goes to show you, if you work hard and apply yourself, one day you can become king of Uganda…

For years, Charles Wesley Mumbere worked as a nurse's aide in Maryland and Pennsylvania, caring for the elderly and sick. No one there suspected that he had inherited a royal title in his African homeland when he was just 13.

On Monday, after years of political upheaval and financial struggle, Mumbere, 56, was finally crowned king of his people to the sound of drumbeats and thousands of cheering supporters wearing cloth printed with his portraits.

Now I just have to wait for Ian to inherit a royal title that I can lift, and I'm totally in there!

Weird. The newspaper article doesn't say which end of the debate over health care reform this guy's on…

The Secret Service is investigating a man who authorities said held a sign reading "Death to Obama" outside a town hall meeting on health-care reform in western Maryland.

It also doesn't say what his preferred cable news network is or whether he thinks a person should ever refer to himself as a "dittohead" with anything other than a deep sense of shame. I guess we'll never know.

But, you know, carrying a sign that says "Death to Obama" is pretty stupid and reckless and aweful. But it's not deeply disturbing or just plain disgusting or anything like that.

Are you sure the sign didn't also say anything else? Can you just double check for us newspaper article?

The sign also read, "Death to Michelle and her two stupid kids," referring to the first name of President Barack Obama's wife, said Washington County Sheriff's Capt. Peter Lazich.

But Michelle who? I just can't quite get a handle on exactly what type of person this guy is. Hmmm…

Good news if you're one of the thirteen atheists living in Arkansas. You might one day be afforded the honor of having an actual legal vote that doesn't matter…

It's an ugly little open secret that Arkansas, Maryland, Mississippi, North Carolina, South Carolina, Tennessee, and Texas have constitutions that explicitly forbid atheists from holding state office. These laws are archaic and unenforceable in principle — they were all ruled unconstitutional in 1961…

Now, though, a representative in Arkansas has submitted a bill to amend the Arkansas constitution and remove the prohibition of atheists.

Can you believe the nerve of Richard Carroll, the guy who submitted this bill? Throwing his hat in with the godless unbelievers. In direct defiance of the defiance of the 1st Amendment?! And in Mike Huckabee's back yard, no less! I never thought I'd see the day.

Can't we just have one small little section of the country where reasonable can go to not be reasonable? Just one?

Fox News calls Massachusetts, Maryland, Illinois, Washington DC, Connecticut, New Jersey, Delaware and Maine for Obama, and Oklahoma for McCain.

By the way, Brit Hume just called their setup "the strategery room." Aw…

Much like great athletes, presidential candidates have coaches who help prepare them for big competitions– in this case, debates.

While Sen. Barack Obama is being coached this year by John Hinckley's defense attorney, Sen. John McCain went with the more Godly pick of Brett O'Donnell, who gained fame as a Jerry Falwell "Agent of Intolerance"…

McCain's chief debate coach is Brett O'Donnell, who molded [Rev. Jerry] Falwell's Liberty University debate team into a powerhouse national champion. O'Donnell, according to a March 2006 New York Times profile of Liberty's debate team, is "an intensely competitive man."…

Falwell chose O'Donnell to make his school's debate team the best in the country to produce "champions for Christ." He may not be turning McCain into a champion for Christ, but he will try to create a champion nevertheless, just as he did with President Bush during the 2004 presidential debates.

McCain also has a stand-in for Barack Obama to help him simulate real-life debate scenarios. And the man playing Obama?

Sit down, now; it's a shocker…

Former Maryland Lieutenant Governor Michael Steele!

I know; I'm stunned too. I was sure they'd go with the corpse of Sammy Davis, Jr.

Steele, despite having only won a single term on the underside of a governor's ticket, is clearly the most popular black Republican not to have played professional football. He gets paraded around like a P.T. Barnum freak any time the Republicans see a TV camera, so it only makes sense that he'd get to play Black Guy #1 in the McCain debate prep session.

And on that note, it's a good thing for McCain that Cynthia McKinney wasn't invited to the debate.

Condoleeza Rice has been preoccupied with Russian affairs all week.

On Tuesday, we posted a whole slew of sexy pictures of Charlize Theron who "spoke" at a pro-labor event here in Denver.

Believe it or not, our trip here hasn't only been movie stars pretending to care about stuff.  We've also seen some honest to goodness politicians who might actually care about stuff like Rep. Mike Michaud of Maine, and Teamster leader James Hoffa, who also attended the event with Ms. Theron.

In the Big Tent, several folks have dropped by. Below are Sen. Dick Durbin, the Senate Majority Whip from Illinois, and Sen. John Tester of Montana mixing it up with the liberal bloggers.

And lastly, Senator Ben Cardin of Maine Maryland* spoke at The Dark Court Panel Discussion.

Check back for more pictures later today.

* @ Harold. Maryland is my home state too.  This is what happens when you don't sleep for 3 nights straight. Still had Michaud on the mind I guess…