Indecision Forever » Nancy Pelosi

Can't These Teabaggers Burn Their Nancy Pelosi Effigy in Peace?

Mary Phillips-Sandy — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 17:29:50 +0000

What is it about the simple act of constructing an effigy in the likeness of another human being and then burning said effigy in a huge bonfire that gets people so upset?

What, exactly?

The chairman of the Danville TEA Party Patriots said Sunday he was unsure about whether the group will continue with its planned effigy burning of Rep. Tom Perriello, D-5th District, and House Speaker Nancy Pelosi at a bonfire rally Saturday in Blairs. [...]

"We've been getting a lot of flack about this," [TPP Chairman Nigel] Coleman said, "about burning those two in effigy and a lot of people in the public are unhappy about it. The story has gotten so large, it's kinda strange."

It is strange! So, so, strange. Why all the attention? Why all the controversy?

Coleman sent a news release to local media Friday about the event, which opened with: "In a move sure to spark controversy, the Danville TEA Party will close their 'Fired Up for Freedom' rally by burning Rep. Tom Perriello and House Speaker Nancy Pelosi in effigy in response to the passage of landmark health care legislation in the U.S. House of Representatives."

Yeah, that doesn't explain the fuss, either.

I guess we'll never know why some people have such crazy, overblown reactions to the world around them.

(Via TPM.)

Laura Ingraham Did Not Call Nancy Pelosi a Cheap Whore

Mary Phillips-Sandy — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 18:49:49 +0000

What, can't a right-wing talk show host mention the Speaker of the House and the phrase "sell her own body" in the same sentence? Is there a "hooker references panel" now too?

Come on. Everybody settle down. Let's look at what Laura Ingraham really said this morning…

Speaking on FOX, Ingraham announced that the speaker did everything but "sell her own body" to win the 220-to-215 vote.

"I mean Nancy Pelosi did everything but sell her own body to get this bill passed… She did everything, everything was on the table. So she had to swallow the bitter bill of the Stupak amendment otherwise this thing wouldn't have passed."

Look, there it is in black and white. Laura Ingraham said Nancy Pelosi did everything but sell her own body to pass the health care bill. That means Laura Ingraham knows Nancy Pelosi did not offer $10 blowjobs in the back of the cloakroom in order to win Blue Dog votes. She absolutely did not do that!

Who would suggest such a terrible thing, anyway?

Boy, some people have filthy minds.

Go Ahead, Guess What's Holding Up the Health Care Vote This Weekend

Mary Phillips-Sandy — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 18:51:17 +0000

Fancy Nancy Pelosi has her heart set on a Saturday vote for this health care thing, because there is nothing in the Constitution to stop her from working on a weekend, but people on both sides of the aisle are digging in their heels, shaking their heads, throwing things, etc., so the vote may not happen until Sunday if it happens at all.

The reason should be obvious…

The question of abortion coverage in the health care bill has bedeviled top Democrats for weeks. Under its current language, the measure would allow individuals to purchase policies through a new insurance exchange that would cover abortion procedures.

Getting "abortion" mixed up with "valid legal medical care" is, of course, contrary to everything America stands for. Doesn't anyone have a better idea, one that won't just cater to pro-choice types?

Democratic leaders may turn to compromise language drafted by Rep. Brad Ellsworth, an Indiana Democrat opposed to abortion rights. Ellsworth has proposed using private contractors to pay providers of abortion services – an idea that has come under fire from both supporters and opponents of abortion rights.

Nice work, Rep. Ellsworth! I don't have a dictionary handy, but I'm pretty sure that's the textbook definition of a compromise.

Jon Stewart: Is Our Dick Going Soft?

Matt Tobey — Wed, 04 Nov 2009 14:54:33 +0000

Say what you will about Dick Cheney (He's a fascist! He scared away all the unicorns! He has Hitler's mustache where his heart should be!), but you have to hand it to him for sticking with the name Dick. He knows it's perhaps the most common euphemism for a penis, and he knows there are several other names one called Richard could hang on himself, but he just stands tall (well, not tall, but you know what I mean) and owns it. That kind of courage reminds me a lot of my Aunt Twat.

The Daily Show airs Monday through Thursday at 11pm / 10c.

A Great Way to Spice Up Your Halloween Tea Party

Dennis DiClaudio — Thu, 29 Oct 2009 16:28:29 +0000

Since you were already planning as dressing up as Sexy Teabagger anyway…

(via Andrew Sullivan)

Democrats Surgically Remove 'Robust' from Nancy Pelosi's Public Option

Mary Phillips-Sandy — Thu, 29 Oct 2009 13:11:25 +0000

Twenty-four hours ago I wrote this silly list of the different public option versions we've seen floating around, and silly me, I missed one. Meet what a CNN headline writer is calling the "tempered" public option…

This version would allow doctors to negotiate reimbursement rates with the federal government, the aides said Wednesday.

The proposal would be a blow to Speaker Nancy Pelosi, who has argued for a more "robust" public option, one that ties reimbursement rates for providers and hospitals to Medicare rates plus a 5 percent increase.

But the votes aren't there for a robust public option, so the "more moderate" "tempered" "other" public option it is. None of those descriptors are catchy at all! How about we call it the "alternative public option"? That might appeal to disenfranchised youth. "Lite public option," on account of that obesity problem? Or, duh: "doctored public option."

By the way, in case you are confused, here is exactly why the public option has been de-testicled:

Democratic House aides said party leaders had yet to resolve long-standing disputes over provisions to prevent federal funds from being used to subsidize abortions and to block illegal immigrants from receiving benefits.

So good luck with your cancer or whatever as the costs of the [adjective here] public option get tied to the medical inflation rates that made a public option necessary in the first place. The important thing is that no money's going to those gals who receive the legal medical service of pregnancy termination. And no Mexicans, either.

Hey, Wait a Minute, Health Care Reform Isn't in the Constitution!

Mary Phillips-Sandy — Wed, 28 Oct 2009 13:02:30 +0000

We've been so wrapped up in the details of health care reform — public options, optional public options, robust public options, public options with a trigger, public options with optional bucket seats, etc. — that we have completely forgotten the most important question of all time: Is any of this even in the Constitution? Anywhere?

The Washington Times is on the case…

Does the U.S. Constitution allow the government to require uninsured Americans to buy medical insurance or impose a tax penalty if they refuse? Congress has never before required citizens to purchase any good or service, but that is what both House and Senate health bills would mandate.

House Speaker Nancy Pelosi dismissed the complaint Thursday when she was asked by a reporter if the Democrats' health reform proposal was constitutional.

"Are you serious? Are you serious?" Mrs. Pelosi replied.

No, Nancy Pelosi, are you serious about the Constitution? Is anyone around here serious about the Constitution?

House Minority Leader John A. Boehner said the argument could not be ignored. "I'm not a lawyer, and I'm certainly not a constitutional lawyer, but I think it's wrong to mandate that the American people have to do anything," he told reporters at his own press briefing last week.

Fuck yes, John Boehner! That's what I'm talking about!

Now, if you'll excuse me, I gotta grab the license I don't have and drive my uninsured car the wrong way down this one-way street, because my 18-year-old brother needs a ride home from refusing to register with the Selective Service System.

The Daily Show on the US's Afghan War Strategy

Matt Tobey — Fri, 09 Oct 2009 17:13:36 +0000

In just a few short months, the US war in Afghanistan will becomes the longest running war in American history. Some say it jumped the shark years ago, but I personally think it's still better than most other wars these days, even if it's not up to the same quality it was six or seven years ago. All I'm saying is, this McChrystal character seems like he could breath new life into it, and I still look forward to the Treehouse of Horror episode every year.

The Daily Show airs Monday through Thursday at 11pm / 10c.

Jon Stewart Nails Congress for Their Jackass Apology Carousel

Matt Tobey — Thu, 17 Sep 2009 13:44:30 +0000

If you saw last night's Daily Show, you saw Jon Stewart expose Congress's longstanding practice of wasting time and avoiding real work by demanding apologies that at best will accomplish nothing and at worst will never come at all. It's truly shameful, so I hereby demand that all legislation be put on hold until the entire United States Congress personally apologizes to each American citizen one at a time.

The Daily Show airs Monday through Thursday at 11pm / 10c.

Joe Wilson Will Not Be Sent to Secret House Torture Chamber (Or Will He?)

Mary Phillips-Sandy — Wed, 16 Sep 2009 13:00:57 +0000

It is a new day in America, because Shouty Joe Wilson has been slapped in the face with a House "resolution of disapproval" and $1.67 million (as of this typing). Choose your own outburst here: "That'll show him!"/"Canonize him, with money!"

So what's in this resolution of disapproval, which the House passed 240-179? Will Joe Wilson be subjected to forty lashes of Steny Hoyer's tongue? Will he be put in solitary confinement and forced to watch Nancy Pelosi's cat videos?

Tell me! How are they going to punish Martyr Joe?

Whereas on September 9, 2009, during the joint session of Congress convened pursuant to House Concurrent Resolution 179, the President of the United States, speaking at the invitation of the House and Senate, had his remarks interrupted by the Representative from South Carolina, Mr. Wilson; and

Whereas the conduct of the Representative from South Carolina was a breach of decorum and degraded the proceedings of the joint session, to the discredit of the House: Now, therefore, be it

Resolved, That the House of Representatives disapproves of the behavior of the Representative from South Carolina, Mr. Wilson, during the joint session of Congress held on September 9, 2009.

Wait, wait, where's the part about disciplining Shouty Joe? Where's the line that says he's getting punished?

Why, it's after the jump…

Awww, there it is!

Seriously, though, what does FoxNews.com know about this secret House torture chamber, and why haven't they told us about it before?