News from South Carolina (state motto: WTF?): Lt. Gov. Andre Bauer has been running around with his foot in his mouth — he's very limber — because of this report right here…

Lt. Gov. Andre Bauer drew a comparison to "feeding stray animals" during a speech about people on government assistance, "babies having babies," and parents whose children are on free and reduced-price lunch.

"My grandmother was not a highly educated woman but she told me as a small child to quit feeding stray animals. You know why? Because they breed. You're facilitating the problem if you give an animal or a person ample food supply. They will reproduce, especially ones that don't think too much further than that. And so what you've got to do is you've got to curtail that type of behavior. They don't know any better," Bauer said.

Now Bauer, a Republican candidate for governor, is apologizing about as eloquently as a raccoon with its head in a dumpster…

"I never intended to tie people to animals," [he told CNN], before opting for a kinder animal metaphor: "If you have a cat, if you take it in your house and feed it and love it, what happens when you go out of town?"

Correct answer: it does not vote for you in the primaries.

^{* The photo? Yeah, that's Bauer (right). He posted this on his Facebook page to indicate his affection for many animal species, including Scientologistus familiaris.}

We already knew ObamaCare was going to kill our Nanas and babies, so it's not a huge leap of logic to assume our pets would also be turned into Obamoylent Green, which is probably why Michigan Congressman Thaddeus McCotter has teamed up with the Pet Industry lobby to push for a pet health care tax deduction.

According to the pet industry trade magazine, Pet Product News, McCotter, a Livonia Republican, introduced the legislation July 31 in conjunction with a Pet Product News survey on the industry.

The legislation is being supported by the lobbying arm of the pet industry, the Pet Industry Joint Advisory Council (PIJAC).

According to the PPN story, the proposed legislation will amend the IRS code to allow pet owners to deduct up to $3,500 in pet related expenses, including veterinary care.

This is obviously great news for pets and their owners, but I imagine some uninsured humans might think this idea is for the birds! And then they'll probably laugh at how clever they are, and the laughter will lead to a coughing fit on account of the consumption.