Below, Jon praises the stand-up comedy debut of Sarah Palin.

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If the Tea Party put up its own candidates for office in this year's congressional elections, 16 percent of registered voters say they would back them, while 45 percent would stick with the Democrats and 33 percent with the Republicans, according to a CNN/Opinion Resarch poll conducted Feb. 12-15.

The net result would be bad news for the GOP: CNN Polling Director Keating Holland said, ""If the Tea Party runs its own candidates for U.S. House, virtually every vote the Tea Party candidate gets would be siphoned from the GOP candidate, potentially allowing the Democrats to win in districts that they might have otherwise lost."

Well, I'm sure that if the GOP just took a few minutes to calmly explain the situation to these Tea Party people, they'd come to the conclusion that running against the Republican Party would be bad for both teams.

I mean, they seem like a pretty reasonable lot.

In the poll, 59 percent say they now support allowing "homosexuals" to serve in the U.S. military, including 34 percent who say they strongly favor that. Ten percent say they somewhat oppose it and 19 percent say they strongly oppose it.

But the numbers differ when the question is changed to whether Americans support "gay men and lesbians" serving in the military. When the question is asked that way, 70 percent of Americans say they support gay men and lesbians serving in the military, including 19 percent who say they somewhat favor it. Seven percent somewhat oppose it, and 12 percent strongly oppose it.

So the solution seems simple enough. Since gay men and lesbians are more popular than homosexuals these days, why not repeal Don't Ask Don't Tell — but only for gays and lesbians? While we're at it, we could pass laws allowing gays and lesbians get married.

Between the marriage equality advocates and the anti-homosexual marriage crowd, we should have more than enough support for that.

Unfortunately, they ran their internet poll on the internet…

Now, to be fair, as Fox points out, "This is not a scientific poll." Certainly not.

If it were "scientific," its results would be kind of suspect.

(via Wonkette)

These past couple months really have been the GOP's Thermopylae, haven't they?

And, come to think of it, it's been just as exciting (if only half as homoerotic) to watch.

(via Andrew Sullivan)

I'm not going to get into any of the stats here and now. Instead, I'll just quote Matthew Tobey, after having sent me the link…

Every time you think you get to the craziest one, you scroll to the next and jump out the window again.

I lost count after my twelfth time out the window.

(via Pharyngula)

Over the course of this past year, Obama has averaged a job approval rating of 88 percent among Democrats and just 23 percent among Republicans, according to the study released on Monday morning.

That year-one 65-point margin is the largest that the public opinion research firm has ever recorded.

That's weird. Why, that's almost like there's some kind of anti-rationality inducing ideology at work here. Like these two political parties have completely separate facts and cannot even agree on simple basic tenets of reality. Like our political system — fueled by a constant stream of hateful, divisive, jingoistic rhetoric — is completely and possibly irreparably broken.

Hmmmm… How odd…

Give up?

Secretary of State Hillary Clinton continues her reign as the Most Admired Woman in the eyes of Americans, but barely edges out former Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin this year, 16% to 15%. [...]

Clinton has now been named Most Admired Woman 14 times since 1993, spanning her career as first lady, New York senator, and now secretary of state. The three times she has not finished first during this time, she earned second place (to Laura Bush in 2001 and to Mother Teresa in 1995 and 1996).

On the other hand, Sarah Palin has 44,704 Twitter followers and Hillary Clinton doesn't know "a Twitter from a tweeter," so let's just call this one a draw.

The top ten list is more than a little shocking…

Just kidding. That's a list of states with the highest percentage of citizens who "say religion is very important in their lives."

Here's the complete list…

Before you get mad at me, let me just say that it's okay for me to make fun of those states. Because they're all very far away from me.*

(via Pharyngula)

.

^{* To be fair, I'm from New Jersey, which comes in at number 30 with 52 percent, which is below the national average, but not exactly a statistic to brag about.**}

^{** You know how much people love bragging about statistics, right?}

So what do Bachmann's constituents think about her?

Michele Bachmann may be controversial but for now she's also looking pretty safe for reelection.

Tested against her potential 2010 opponents Bachmann leads Tarryl Clark 55-37 and Maureen Reed 53-37. Bachmann's leads over them will probably get smaller as they become better known, but she is still over the 50% threshold considered safe for an incumbent. [...]

37% of voters in the district consider Bachmann's political views to be 'extremist.'

We should probably assume they mean that last part as a compliment.

Aaaawww… You shouldn't have.

(via Think Progress and Andrew Sullivan)

Hmmmmm… What a complex and difficult question. Let's see. On the one hand, gay people are human beings who deserve of the same inalienable rights as any other person born on this planet. And state-sanctioned execution for sexual orientation is barbaric.  And we live in the motherfucking 21st Century.

But on the other, this world is a fucking horrible place.

Tough one!

How about a little help here?

As WND points out, a new poll shows the actually embarrassing fact that…

Democrats are far more in touch with the dead than Republicans and they also visit fortune-tellers more often… The results also show that Democrats are far more likely to believe in supernatural phenomena than Republicans.

Yikes! That's not a poll result to be proud of Democrats! What's funny is that since practically all liberals are born in late-December/early-January, that their innate Capricornian practicality would keep them from believing in deeply-embarrassing stuff like that.

One thing's for sure: You won't catch conservatives buying into unprovable, ancient, mystical superstition like that. Isn't that right, very-next-paragraph-of-WorldNetDaily-article?

The Bible has plenty to say about communicating with the dead and dabbling with mediums, psychics, fortune-tellers, witchcraft, astrology and characters such as the devil and his wicked demons. Find out specifics in this autographed, No. 1 best-seller that champions the truth of God!

Right! You know, God didn't send Himself down to Earth to have Himself executed to appease Himself and forgive us for all the sins we weren't even aware we were committing for nothing!

Come on, Democrats! Stop being so gullible and start worshiping the man who lives in the sky!

Perhaps the greatest measure of Obama's declining support is that just 50% of voters now say they prefer having him as President to George W. Bush, with 44% saying they'd rather have his predecessor.

Seems kind of early in his first term for Obama to nearly achieve the kind of unpopularity it too Bush eight years to hit, doesn't it?

Though, he is a hard worker. You have to give him that.

In the 2010 Congressional elections will you definitely vote, probably vote, not likely vote, or definitely will not vote?

Voter Intensity: Definitely + Probably Voting/Not Likely + Not Voting

Republican Voters: 81/14
Independent Voters: 65/23
Democratic Voters: 56/40

Actually, that's probably a good idea, Democratic voters. Stay home and rest your lever-pulling fingers that day. You'll need them for typing angry diatribes against Congress in the comments of Daily Kos.

'Cause that's where Democracy really happens.

The percentage of Americans who believe global warming is happening has dipped from 80 to 72 percent in the past year, according to a new Washington Post-ABC News poll, even as a majority still support a national cap on greenhouse gas emissions…

The increase in climate skepticism is driven largely by a shift within the GOP. Since its peak 3 1/2 years ago, belief that climate change is happening is down sharply among Republicans — 76 to 54 percent — and independents — 86 to 71 percent. It dipped more modestly among Democrats, from 92 to 86 percent. A majority of respondents still support legislation to cap emissions and trade pollution allowances, by 53 to 42 percent.

Wow! That's practically the same 52 percent of Republicans who discovered somehow that evil mastermind community organization ACORN fixed the national election to illegally hand the presidency to Muslim Kenyan spy Barack Obama. What do those people know that the rest of us don't?

Maybe it's just that they're better at interpreting the evidence…

Amanda Feinberg, a retired administrative assistant living in South Williamsport, Pa., said she became disenchanted with the idea of human-caused global warming when former vice president Al Gore launched a public awareness campaign with his documentary, "An Inconvenient Truth."

"He just seemed a little radical in his views," said Feinberg, a Republican. "I don't deny it's happening, I just think it's just an evolution of nature."

Well, that rationale certainly checks out. In fact, it's the exact same way that Nicolaus Copernicus formulated his theory of heliocentric cosmology. To spite some guy he didn't care for who was being all smug about how the Sun's always rotating around the Earth and stuff.

Ah, Science!

"This issue is breaking out in a remarkably rapid way now," said Ethan Nadelmann, executive director of the Drug Policy Alliance. "Public opinion is changing very, very rapidly."

The shift is widely described as generational. A Gallup poll in October found 44 percent of Americans favor full legalization of marijuana — a rise of 13 points since 2000. Gallup said that if public support continues growing at a rate of 1 to 2 percent per year, "the majority of Americans could favor legalization of the drug in as little as four years."

My God! By the end of this century, more than 200 percent of all Americans will support the legalization of marijuana! That means that everybody you know and all the people they know and all the people they don't know will support it.

I wonder if that'll be a high-enough percentage to influence congressional Democrats to get behind reform.

Probably not.

Conservatives must be salivating over this new Gallup poll…

Since September, Obama's approval rating had been holding in the low 50s and, although it has reached 50% numerous times, it had never dropped below 50% until now.

Of the post-World War II presidents, Obama now is the fourth fastest to drop below the majority approval level, doing so in his 10th month on the job. Gerald Ford dropped below 50% approval during his third month in office, and Bill Clinton did so in his fourth month. Ronald Reagan, like Obama, also dropped below 50% in his 10th month in office, though Reagan's drop occurred a few days sooner in that month (Nov. 13-16, 1981) than did Obama's (Nov. 17-19, 2009).

…I mean, they love anything that mentions Ronald Reagan.

Right?

The poll asked this question: "Do you think that Barack Obama legitimately won the Presidential election last year, or do you think that ACORN stole it for him?" The overall top-line is legitimately won 62%, ACORN stole it 26%.

Among Republicans, however, only 27% say Obama actually won the race, with 52% — an outright majority — saying that ACORN stole it, and 21% are undecided.

Yep, 52% of Republicans think ACORN stole the 2008 presidential election, using nothing but their patented stupidity to secure 53% of the popular vote for Obama. Another 21% of Republicans think, well, maybe. Yeah. That certainly sounds plausible, but… hmm, who can say for sure?

After all, if there's one thing we know about ACORN, it's that they're masters of getting away with illegal activity without anybody ever noticing.