Wow. We seem right now to be in a modern Golden Age of voter fraud allegations, don't we? And for good reason. It's so much less gory and blood-splattered than military coups. Well, usually.

So, while we're all waiting for everything in the world to get better and political power to be doled out fairly according to those who have earned it, let's watch some Daily Show clips…

September 17, 2009: Voter Fraud in Afghanistan

The Daily Show airs Monday through Thursday at 11pm / 10c.

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Call them what you will — puppets, dummies, inanimate objects being controlled by more powerful forces — but they control the world in which we live. Or, to be more precise, they are controlled into controlling the world in which we live.

For more-entertaining, less-politically-damaging puppets, tune into the new Comedy Central series The Jeff Dunham Show premiering this Thursday, October 22 at 9pm / 8c.

Who had even heard of this Rep. John Shadegg (R-AZ) before today? Why didn't anyone alert us to this man's astonishing ability to make Michele Bachmann look like the most reasonable human on earth?

More importantly, why hasn't anyone other than Rep. Shadegg — who spoke yesterday on the House floor — told us about the 'gulag' provisions in the Democrats' health care proposals?

SHADEGG: You know, it occurs to me, and I’ll go through these other scandals very quickly, but what we're really getting here is we're not just getting single-payer care. We’re getting full on Russian gulag, Soviet-style gulag health care [...] It appeared in last Friday's Wall Street Journal. You can Google it. You can pick up the phone and call Kim Strassel. You can ask her about Soviet-style gulag health care in America, where powerful politicians protect their constituents.

(For the uninitiated, Kim Strassel is a WSJ editorial writer who does not care for Democrats, health care reform, treehuggers, crybabies, non-pen-and-ink portraits of herself, etc.)

Fascinating how Rep. Shadegg has access to Google, or has at least heard of it, yet is unable to avail himself of a definition of the word 'gulag.' Maybe we can call Kim Strassel and ask if she has a spare dictionary on her desk?

Help, someone. I feel faint…

The new plan that President Obama laid out for a missile shield against Iran on Thursday turns Ronald Reagan's vision of a Star Wars system on its head: Rather than focusing first on protecting the continental United States, it shifts the immediate effort to defending Europe and the Middle East.

Nooo! Not Ronald Reagan's vision of a Star Wars system! That's like snatching food from the hands of a starving orphan and then eating a pizza in front of him, just to spite Mother Teresa's ghost!

There's no time to read about how Obama's plan will replace old technology with new technology and realign defense priorities based on what Iran is actually doing with its short-range missile program. No time for that, we need a delivery of smelling salts to the Weekly Standard…

This is a decision based purely on ideology and the good soldiers on the Joint Chiefs of Staff and and at the Pentagon have no choice but to go along for the ride. At least the president ought to be honest about what this means and stop the smears of missile defense.

Quick poll: Are Barack Obama's smears of our missile defense system motivated by race, yes or no?

Why is my tax money going toward government organizations shooting death rays from outer space at aging pop musicians? This is like the Carter administration all over again.

FSB sources are reporting to President Medvedev today that American pop icon Michael Jackson was "most assuredly" assassinated by the US Central Intelligence Agency (CIA) after an examination of data transmitted by a Russian Military's Kosmos 2450 satellite show "conclusively" that immediately prior to the music stars death in Los Angeles an electromagnetic pulse consistent in pattern to EMR weapons looted from the former Soviet Union by the United States was employed at the "exact coordinates" of the rock stars home.

Hmmm… That seems slightly implausible. But I'm going to give these unnamed Russian sources the benefit of the doubt, because I've never been burnt by unnamed Russian sources before.

Obviously, the CIA has, like, a million billion reasons to use top secret stolen Soviet satellite weapons technology to assassinate the guy who sang "Smooth Criminal." The only real problem is narrowing them down to one…

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As if we needed any more proof that Barack Obama is a not-so-secret communist pawn, he actually traveled back to his ideological home in Russia to pick up orders for the next four years. (And he thought we wouldn't notice.)

In an effort to educate our citizens of the dangers of The Big Cold Bear (or whatever they call it), here's ten years worth of The Daily Show reports — seven in all (in honor of how many shots of vodka I can drink before I die) — on Russia…

1. Russo-Georgian Conflict

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