Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez — a.k.a. the most reasonable person in South America — has just about had it with a certain international terrorist organization, hellbent on upsetting the status quo and overthrowing society as we know it.

I'm speaking, of course, of Twitter…

After an unprecedented demonstration in the virtual social network Twitter, where thousands of messages calling for his resignation and called for Venezuela to press freedom and opinion, the president of Venezuela, Hugo Chávez, asked the National Assembly deputies to prepare a law to control the Internet…

Twitter could be declared 'a tool of terror' because the deputies, responding to the presidential request, said they will intervene "for the welfare of the people", eliminating terrorist threats posed by social networks.

If there were only some way to figure out how these terrorists were communicating with one another.

(via Boing Boing)

You really can't get anything past the Venezuelan media, can you?

Both a Venezuelan state-owned radio and television properties zeroed in on a secret U.S. "weapon of earthquakes" as the cause of the earthquake that struck Haiti last week causing a death toll could exceed 200,000 according to some sources.

On the website of Radio Nacional de Venezuela (RNV) are published statements of the university professor, Vladimir Acosta, a regular contributor to the media controlled by the government of Hugo Chávez, accusing the U.S. of wanting to make Haiti a protectorate under the guise of the natural disaster.

But to further the conspiracy theory, argued that "we have the worrisome suspicion that this earthquake may be associated with the project called HAARP, a system that can generate violent and unexpected changes in climate."

The idea that President Obama would use a weather-controlling weapon to cause the Haitian earthquake is absurd.

That would involve formulating a plan and making a decision.

(via Andrew Sullivan)

You may have already seen this photograph of drug-addled, bane-of-music Courtney Love snuggling with insane, communist dictator Hugo Chavez at some kind of convention for horrible people held recently in New York (where else?)…

But what you haven't seen — what this photograph is obscuring, through clever lighting and some simple Photoshopping — is everyone else who was also at the convention and originally included in the picture before press agents and P.R. firms stepped in to hide the truth.

What we have here — exclusively! — after the jump is the original, unedited photograph taken at the horrible person convention before it fell victim to any computer trickery…

Read more »

Submitted by flasunbum.

President Obama wants the citizens of the United States to know that this Swine Flu — which, from what I gather from watching the news channels, has already claimed 900 bazillion U.S. lives (give or take a bazillion) — is nothing to worry about, even though it is somewhat worrying…

"We are closely monitoring the emerging cases of swine flu in the United States," Mr. Obama said, speaking at the National Academy of Sciences. "This is obviously the cause for concern and requires a heightened state of alert, but it's not a cause for alarm."

Got that? Be alert, but don't be alarmed. I guess, the best way to differentiate between the two is like this:

A squirrel, eating an acorn in the grass, is alert. A squirrel, screaming and clawing his way through a crowded subway terminal in a vain attempt to escape a horrifying pestilence, is alarmed.

The remarks by Mr. Obama, which came at the beginning of a previously-scheduled speech that he delivered to scientists in Washington, marked the first time the president has personally addressed the swine flu.

Fantastic! If he's not bowing down before the Saudi King Abdullah bin Abdel Aziz or shaking hands with Venezualan President Hugo Chavez, then he's entering into friendly negotiations with a potential worldwide pandemic.

Doesn't he know that you have to play tough with these pathogenic agents? You didn't see George Bush cozying up to monkeypox back in his first term, did you?